I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
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