so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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