Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
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