You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Randomize
