Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I just farted at work and tried to cover up the noise by shuffling papers around
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
It's just like the Real World with babies
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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