I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Less talking, more tequila
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
