I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
