piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
