I showed him my bush... on skype.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
