He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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