Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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