i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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