you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Randomize
