You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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