Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
