Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize
