I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Randomize
