i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
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