Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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