This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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