Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Randomize
