how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Couch. On fire.
Randomize
