And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
