I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
