there's paper in my vomit.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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