love makes seman taste better
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
