Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
