how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Randomize