It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
Randomize
