let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Michael Bay diarrhea
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Randomize
