I think im going to throw up on grandma
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Sorry my hands just texted you
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Randomize
