You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
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