Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize
