I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
