This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize
