ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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