do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Randomize