"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
