how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
i just google imaged poop.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
