I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
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