Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Randomize
