doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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