sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Randomize