While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
