Already got asked if we're dating
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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