I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
