I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
i came on her dog
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
