Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
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