I want to walk on stilts...naked
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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