so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
